That’s My Girl!
December 4, 2008
Listen, Oprah sucks.
I’m saying this with two very distinct points: a philosophical one and a general one. Oprah has this problem, where she tends to believe that she has the ability to dictate the world around her such that everyone in America lives in a space that is entirely customized by the woman herself. She peddles her favorite merchandise, a unique and shoddy brand of spirituality, somewhat shaky medical advice, and terrible politics. In a general sense, I really do think, after the last six months of watching her, that she’s not a very nice person.
And I don’t think I’m alone. A couple of weeks ago, I was traveling through the Chicago airport, when I ran into some women who had their arms full of Oprah’s signature green bags. Wanting to be friendly, I asked them if they’d been to the Oprah show and whether they had played their cards right and gotten the “Favorite Things” episode, where Oprah lavishes gifts on her audience as a way of showing American what they should definitely be buying for themselves this holiday season. They turned to me and said, “yeah, but it sucked.” Always intrigued, I asked them why. Apparently, in these “tough economic times,” Oprah decided to forgo giving her audience things and instead show them how to have a merry Christmas at little or no cost to themselves, by making bad crafts and things people will never use, store in a closet and only take out when you come over for a visit the next holiday season.
Fantastic. Now, apparently, Oprah’s excuse was that even SHE couldn’t afford all of the lavish things, but experience with obnoxious, self-absorbed middle-aged women tells me there’s another reason. I worked a long time in retail, and companies like Origins, Estee Lauder, Barefoot Dreams and others would send product after product to Oprah in the hopes that she would plug it on her show. They would send BOXES of free stuff for her audience because one fifteen second blurb on the show was worth MILLIONS in sales. One year, Origins introduced a “White Tea” cream that was supposed to rebuild the anti-oxidants in your skin, Oprah loved it and told Origins that it would be featured on her Favorite Things episode. Two days later, the store received a huge shipment of the stuff (boxes and boxes and boxes), and all of it sold out the day after. All of it. Origins had a very nice Christmas.
The problem is, in order to get this, you have to agree to let Oprah market your product, as though Oprah were someone people trusted. After the kerfuffle surrounding her endorsement of Barack Obama, her show ratings plummeted, her magazine subscriptions fell by 10% and after alienating a clear 50% of her audience plus whichever women were pulling for Senator Clinton, she effectively made herself one of the most hated brands in the country. This year, when called upon to send in sweets, creams, lotions and bathrobes for the Favorite Things episode, I’m guessing that more than a few marketing departments decided it was not in their best interest to affiliate themselves with someone who have the women in the country now openly despise.
She could have rectified herself, of course. People like me were clamoring for her to have Sarah Palin on. After all, who better exemplifies the modern American woman than Sarah? She’s smart, accomplished, a mother, wife, Governor. Hell, its like a total booking freebie. Of course, with a lame excuse, Oprah refused.
And now, it appears, when Oprah wants Sarah on in order to boost her sagging ratings and re-establish her credibility with conservative women and compassionate feminists the world over, Sarah’s not going to give her the time of day.
It’s not Oprah Winfrey’s fault that former Vice Presidential candidate Sarah Palin hasn’t been a guest on her talk show yet! Winfrey declared, “I said I would be happy to talk to Sarah Palin when the election was over… I went and tried to talk to Sarah Palin and instead she talked to Greta [Van Susteren]. She talked to Matt [Lauer]. She talked to Larry [King]. But she didn’t talk to me. But maybe she’ll talk to me now that she has a [multi-million dollar] book deal.”
When asked if Oprah will have Barack Obama on the show, she responded, “There’s always an open invitation for the president-elect and first lady.”
I am so proud of her at this very moment. Occasionally, I think Sarah is so much raw talent, but that she sometimes makes tragic mistakes that allow people to take advantage of her. Not this time. This time, Sarah told Oprah where she could shove her interview, and its one of the most wonderful things I’ve read in weeks. I want to fist pump the air and tell Imaginary Oprah to TAKE THAT.
But I won’t.
Posted in Uncategorized
December 4th, 2008 at 5:34 pm
Oh pump your fist anyway; it’s cute.
December 4th, 2008 at 9:16 pm
EM, if you hosted a talk show wearing a Commander Data Star Trek uniform I would watch… for fifteen seconds… maybe.
–Nick
http://www.RightMichigan.com
December 4th, 2008 at 9:26 pm
EM, Do you really think “O” is that despised by so many women in america? I personally have not been able to watch her show ever, the very thought of doing so made me feel like my eyeballs would pop out of my head like Schwarzenegger in Total Recall. But I respect the pull her show has and I would be surprised if it has diminished that much.
Good for Sarah any way though, if she wasn’t good enough to interview before why should she do it now!!!
December 5th, 2008 at 6:15 am
EM, I hope Sarah never makes an appearence on Oprah! With any luck the women that Oprah used all these years will wake up when Obama ruins this Country and realize they were under the spell of a racist fat woman. Her star was always fake and one sided. I never watched her show and quite frankly thought her “free gifts” were condescending. Sarah will suprise us all in 2012, win the seat she deserved and clean up the mess in Washington that this new administration will surely make. Go Team Sarah!
December 5th, 2008 at 6:32 am
I’ve never been able to watch Oprah either. I work during the day. And on those rare days when I’m home and she’s on, I never could understand the need to cry at all those sob stories. Where does that get you? Read a good book, take a walk, converse with real people, donate your time, do some kind of work, clean something…don’t sit there and stagnate on her waste of time. I do agree with Sarah’s decision! You go, Sarah!!
December 5th, 2008 at 7:22 am
Oprah lost me when she told a bunch of young (early teen) black rock musicians that their momma luvs them because she heard “…she packs them condoms’
Now glorifying random sex after dragging tears from her audience telling them how destructive it was to be sexually abused by a relative just might have a relationship. Oprah doesn’t get it - recreational sex is abuse! Encouraging early teens to engae in it is also abuse.
December 5th, 2008 at 8:13 am
This is Palin’s “Sister Soldja Moment”. I hope she sticks to her guns. I hated Oprah when it wasn’t trendy to hate Oprah. I used to chide my wife’s friends for watching her. Its good to see conservative women waking up.
December 5th, 2008 at 8:28 am
Sarah will go…..when her show is canceled
December 5th, 2008 at 8:31 am
Go Sarah! Oprah does not deserve Sarah Palin on her show. She bashed her all through the campaign, and now is kissing up to her just to try and get some more viewers. Because, sorry Oprah, Sarah Palin is more popular than you. SORRY
December 5th, 2008 at 8:55 am
I’ll give Oprah this much, she never underestimated what easy marks bored women with money are. Mother lode!
December 5th, 2008 at 10:08 am
Sarah is the future; Oprah is SO OVER!
December 5th, 2008 at 10:25 am
My respect for Sarah Palin has escalated ENOURMOUSLY. Hope she NEVER gives Oprah the time of day.
December 5th, 2008 at 10:37 am
I don’t watch the show. It’s on in the middle of the day, and I work for a living.
Sarah/Trig 2012!
December 5th, 2008 at 10:53 am
I don’t think that many people, or more specifically women, “hate” Oprah as much as the commercial and cultural phenomenon that surrounds her. My wife shrugs her shoulders and says “meh” to the whole Oprah thing, as she does with Martha Stewart, Rachel Ray (sp?) and any other of these celebrity women who are said to be iconic of North American femininity. But then my wife wasn’t taken in by Obama, and she’s no rightwinger, kneejerk conservative (she wasn’t keen on Hilary either — thought the whole democrat and republican field was weak this cycle).
I don’t know if it is a function of personality, but people with reasonably healthy egos don’t need daytime show hosts to tell them what to read, eat, wear, smear on their face, etc. If someone provides good, reasonably unbiased information, then I’ll watch but reserve judgment. It’s a sign of massive dysfunction that so many still rely on Oprah as an opinion leader.
December 5th, 2008 at 11:17 am
Hi Emily-
Gosh, you took the text right out of my fingers. I once had some admiration for Oprah for some obvious reasons, but fully lost respect for her when she chose to not be intellectually curious enough to vet Obama and his background, but rather vote for him simply because of the color of his skin. She lead a movement that set back race relations a generation. She is now known in some circles as Doprah.
She has gained some notoriety by qualifying for the blog Boycott the Main Stream Media
She may as well be in bed with Sean Penn now. Her story is over.
December 5th, 2008 at 11:28 am
If Oprah Winfrey announced on her show that the key to her success has been a daily regimen of white vinegar enemas, supermarkets and drug stores would suddenly find it very difficult to keep white vinegar and enema bottles on their shelves.
December 5th, 2008 at 11:41 am
I suspect that you did not see the episode where she and friend Gayle discussed the benefits of a complete colon cleansing.
December 5th, 2008 at 11:56 am
Go read the comments on the HuffyPoost article. The derangement is just transfering from Bush to Palin, and none of the rabidness is diminished. What fools.
December 5th, 2008 at 12:21 pm
I never got into any of the day time talk shows. Is there anything that comes out of any that is worth listening to. The only interesting one was the Jerry Springer Show, at least it was exciting and you never knew what was going to happen. They paid people to be on his show and even for different roles. Then give them alcohol before the show to get them in the mood to argue. Pretty much it was daytime WWE.
December 5th, 2008 at 12:29 pm
I tend to agree with Rickvid. Sarah Palin has almost the total package, and if there were a (D-AK) after Palin she would be having her praises sung from the mountaintops for her accomplishments… but she not. Now she’s just a focalpoint for the hatemongers of the left.
Oprah is typical of those that set themselve up in castles and think that the world revolves around them. They have little clue about the real world, for their life is full of people telling them exactly what they want to hear.
December 5th, 2008 at 4:07 pm
Oprah is so done!!!!!!! It is about time people start standing up to her. She thinks she is some sort of GOD. We need to get these kind of women of the air. Her and the women from the View. God Bless Sahar Palin. She ROCKS!!!!!!!
December 5th, 2008 at 5:55 pm
[...] E.M. Zanotti’s latest post on Oprah and Sarah begins thusly, Listen, Oprah sucks. [...]
December 5th, 2008 at 7:14 pm
I cannot stand Oprah!!,,talk about RACIST!,I use to be gulliable enough to watch her and actually believe she cared about all people no matter what RACE,,what a FOOL I was!,,I have stopped watching her show and I know ALOT of others that have also!,,rumor had it that her magizine has gone under,,sorry but i say ,,Oh well!!,,now maybe her show will too!!!,,no I don’t go around wishing hard on people,,but you know when you do people wrong,,God has a way of getting you back alot better than anyone else can!,,and her times coming!,,especially after it was aired where her and her racist buddy Gayle were talking about how WHITE’S were working for her!,,and how things have changed,,it’s no longer the blacks slaving for the whites,,now the whites are ‘working for her’!,,how RACISTS!
December 5th, 2008 at 8:13 pm
You gotta love Pallin. Oprah is a bad joke and now she is reaping the fruits of her over grown brain. She can pump her fist. Just like all the other progressives. Let’s see what the country thinks of the annointed one in two years when we are facing another depression.
December 5th, 2008 at 8:59 pm
the thing about oprah though is how she told the world about the secret. now i’m able to manifest all sorts of things just by thinking about them. it’s revolutionized the way i do everything. and when it doesn’t work, i just know it’s because i’m not as advanced as oprah.
December 8th, 2008 at 8:29 am
“…after the last six months of watching her…”
Why would you do that to yourself?
December 9th, 2008 at 10:17 pm
Well, you have to pity the poor down trodden black woman, (who is a multibillionaire, with more ignorant non-critical thought processes than my cat) cause she’s fallen off the diet wagon, and is back up to 200 lbs. OMG! Dieting is hard… Thinking is hard. Too bad for her she can’t do either. But then, I’ve watched exactly one full episode, while in severe pain, in a Dr’s office waiting room. And I’m a guy, so my views of her fake condescending attitude don’t really count.
EM, you could do that show without a cue card… Sarah P. could do that show without a cue card. Oprah needs a cue card, a teleprompter, and a map to find her own…
don’t forget to visit and lol ur pols pho paws!