Sweet Home…Austin?
July 20, 2008
UPDATE: It occurred to me, reading some of the Netroots “reaction” pieces to the Austin summit over my decidedly midwestern lunch of fried McDonalds chicken, that I didn’t quite say enough about them. They attempted several “infiltrations” as if to try to prove that the right was “incapable” of hosting a gathering as large as theirs, and therefore the Austin RightOnline summit wasn’t as “important” somehow. Lets say first that, the point of the Austin summit was not to draw a million idiots out from their tinfoil covered, earth friendly dwelling holes, but to gather together a group of like minded, motivated individuals who have already dedicated themselves to forming an effective conservative movement. There are few, but they are a proud, proud few. Because AFP and others wanted this weekend to be about work and not about sharing your secret Bush documents and “covert” talking points, the meeting was deliberately kept small. Personally, I fear small things more than big things. Okay, not the big things that could crush or annihilate me, but like, I fear poisonous snakes more than I do large, easily confused land mammals (save for when they stampede). Its probably a bad metaphor, but I hope to think, one day, of Austin as the poisonous snake. Clearly, the Netroots are the land mammal. That one’s not hard to understand.
But because they were apparently very threatened and had to soothe their poor, wounded egos by assuring themselves that conservatives did not yet have a vast Netroots, they snuck over a couple of times to take pictures and/or attempt to harass Michelle Malkin. The succeeded only at the first one, and even then, it was pretty lame. In order to get kicked out of AFP’s summit, you had to stand out like a sore thumb, and that didn’t mean not having a green name badge. In fact, the only tools I saw wandering around Austin religiously wearing their conference name badges belong to Netroots Nation. They were orange. When we showed up at their party, we had to kind of hide lest they notice we were lacking neckwear. So when FireDogLake boasts that its intrepid reporter was kicked out, its because he was acting like a douche and easily recognizable by some sharp web folks as an across-town conference-goer, not because he happened to be wearing a Hawaiian shirt.
And believe me, it wasn’t hard to spot them. Republicans get a lot of flack for the apparently mass-mailed dress code of Steve & Barry’s chinos and Ralph Lauren polos as well they should. It was all well and good when William F. Buckley was around and the Preppy Handbook was a best-seller, but yes, college Republican squares need to up the ante in the wardrobe department. Just switching to Burberry doesn’t do much for the image except reinforce it. But back to the dress code. Everyone at Daily Kos was surprisingly similar looking. All of them had that “so rebellious its conformist” thing going on — like they’d received a directive from their fearless leader requiring square eyeglasses, a slightly visible extra piercing and a one-size-too-small tee shirt emblazoned with a nonsensical yet hip-looking pattern. At least we vary the colors. I’ll be damned if there’s any earth-toned organic cotton yarn left in this world after this last weekend. Somewhere, n the third world, they’re having to use the discarded “recycled” polyester thread. Every single one of them looked like “that guy.” You know, the one whose bratty kids escape from their ergonomic strollers and spread germs all over the Saturday farmers market? Yeah, I mean, they’re white. You get it, I’m sure. It was actually so blindingly obvious that it made me feel better about the fact that occasionally there’s very little diversity at the conferences I attend.
In closing, I have to say, that the very best part of having the Nutroots across town is that we could watch them very closely and we stayed interested. Typically we don’t care. This weekend, we felt obligated to. They were eating each other alive. Code Pink showed up there to shout Nancy Pelosi off the stage. Al Gore, the surprise guest and their presumptive god, was met with accusatory questions about his decision not to go vegan. Heh.
***
So I just returned from RightOnline, and while I’m glad to be back where I can safely eat hot dogs and be part of the local color, I have to say…there’s nothing quite like Texas. I’ve never been west of the Mississippi, and Austin was definitely a great introduction. Now, there was a lot going on down there, and you can probably read about that elsewhere…heck, just about everyone was writing about it…so instead of giving you a great rundown of all the strategic victories we hope to win by encouraging state and local level bloggers to join forces and defeat the armies of evil marching toward Mordor (yeah, I stole that from Erik Erickson), here are some of my more…interesting experiences in the Lone Star State:
1. Okay, I was told Texas was like a “whole ‘nother country” but to be honest, I never believed it until Thursday night, walking into a barbecue joint called Rudy’s, which appeared to have been converted out of the kind of abandoned gas station popularized by Hitchcock movies. On the wall in the outdoor seating area was a giant mural — a big oval — with the words “Real People Eat Meat” circling a lovely Texas scene: cattle marching headon toward slaughter proudly brandishing the Texas flag. Now, I’m not a full-time vegetarian and I’m only a half-assed PETA member, but let me tell you, suddenly, I felt very, very alone.
2. Bob Novak is afraid of me. I’ve never seen anyone book it away from me quite that fast. Now, yes, I know. I shouldn’t take anything Bob Novak happens to do personally (after all, he is the prince of darkness), but in all my years of attending lame political functions, only Duncan Hunter has ever quite risen to that level of…”ewwww” after having seen me. I feel…lucky…somehow. Honored, even.
3. Friday night, after a long day of eating boxed lunches, drinking coffee and hanging out with important people, vainly attempting to convince them that I, too, was someone important, I managed to snag an invite to downtown Austin where the plan was to eat freshly prepared Tex-Mex, drink strawberry margaritas and hang out with important people who would, in turn, vaguely attempt to convince me that I was someone important enough to buy them liquor. For a few hours, this plan worked. Then, whilst wandering around that Ann Arbor-Bourbon Street mashup known as “Sixth Street,” my party ended up unintentionally crashing the Daily Kos party. Now, we would admit to fully intending to crash Daily Kos, except that (a) security wasn’t that good as evidenced by the really dorky looking people that were populating the lower level and (b) the stupid party had a cash bar. Only liberals would be so tacky as to have a cash bar at what clearly was supposed to be the seminal event of their re-education weekend.
In other news about how lame the Nutroots convention attendees were: I got hit on three times at the Daily Kos party by Daily Kos tee-shirt wearing bespectacled hipsters, all of whom used exactly the same bizarre pickup line. They asked whether I was from New York. Upon learning that I was, in fact, not from New York, they refused to buy me a drink. I was then, apparently, supposed to inquire about their homes, and perhaps express a desire to move to the city with the crappiest pizza? I don’t know. Clearly, I lack the skills necessary to successfully mate with a hippie.
Also, while we managed to extract ourselves from the event unscathed and totally undetected, several lefties intent on disrupting Michelle Malkin’s speech were captured and released back into the wild before they ever reached the convention hall doors. Heh. And it didn’t appear the conference people were even checking nametags.
4. Republicans can drink. A lot.
5. The jury is still out on the food. The brisket was definitely fantastic. The Mexican food…meh. Something tells me that I’m going to have to schedule a trip back to Texas just to travel around and eat. I’m all for this if I can find a willing sponsor.
I’ll update later, maybe, with more observations…as soon as I sleep long enough to remember what the hell I did this weekend. And no, that lack of memory has nothing to do with booze. I have plenty of witnesses that can attest to that.
Trust me.
Posted in Uncategorized
July 20th, 2008 at 1:04 pm
I got hit on three times at the Daily Kos party by Daily Kos tee-shirt wearing bespectacled hipsters, all of whom used exactly the same bizarre pickup line. They asked whether I was from New York. —–>
it is possible that a bad pickup line is making the rounds among guys; another theory, perhaps more likely, is that you look intelligent, and they associated intelligent looking people as being from New York
the city with the crappiest pizza —-> deep dish is great and i love it; in addition, not in competition, but in addition, these guys are Zagat rated, have lines around the block every night, and hold their own; thin crust, real coal, and around for over 50 years —->http://www.grimaldis.com
I thought YOU were the one that invented the phrase “no taxation without information”……. ?
will you post your speech ?
cheers
July 20th, 2008 at 4:38 pm
4. Republicans can drink. A lot.
That is a talent/skill they are going to need a lot in the next 4-8 years.
July 20th, 2008 at 5:36 pm
My favorite memory of Texas is of pulling into a hotel on the outside of El Paso, expecting to find the best Mexican food of my life, and instead having to settle for mediocre bratwurst and sauerkraut at the only place in walking distance: a German, family-owned restaurant named Gunther’s Edelweiss. The next night, I snuck across the border and had extremely good Mexican food, but I just couldn’t help but laugh at the dashed expectations.
July 20th, 2008 at 5:41 pm
KG, that’s hilarious.
Em, did someone take a picture of him running away?
And since you’re too modest to do it herself, here is the New York Times coverage of it all: http://thecaucus.blogs.nytimes.com/2008/07/18/texas-boot-camp-for-bloggers-on-the-right/
July 20th, 2008 at 6:19 pm
hanging out with important people
that makes decisive “you are important people”…especially when i compare it with number 2; Bob Novak….
July 20th, 2008 at 7:26 pm
1. We were in Texas.
2. We were in a college town.
3. I did my part.
And if you do get that Texas food tour sponsorship and need a partner in crime you know how to get a hold of me.
July 20th, 2008 at 7:59 pm
Dude, I already have an offer for the food sponsorship. All I need is a cheap airfare and I am set to ROLL.
July 20th, 2008 at 8:47 pm
Let’s get Coke and some consumer group to pay for the flights. I want to preach the greatness of Coca-Cola w/ real cane sugar in glass bottles. God bless Mexico!
July 20th, 2008 at 9:28 pm
You’d never been West of the Mississippi before?
Do yourself a favor, visit exotic Iowa. You won’t be disappointed. Wait, yeah you will.
Seriously though, there is a lot of good stuff between the Mighty Miss and the I-5 hippie corridor.
July 20th, 2008 at 9:55 pm
[...] Emily Zanotti of the Sam Adams Alliance a conservative-libertarian think tank in Chicago came away with this impression of Texas: Okay, I was told Texas was like a “whole ‘nother country†but to be honest, I never believed it until Thursday night, walking into a barbecue joint called Rudy’s, which appeared to have been converted out of the kind of abandoned gas station popularized by Hitchcock movies. On the wall in the outdoor seating area was a giant mural — a big oval — with the words “Real People Eat Meat†circling a lovely Texas scene: cattle marching headon toward slaughter proudly brandishing the Texas flag. Now, I’m not a full-time vegetarian and I’m only a half-assed PETA member, but let me tell you, suddenly, I felt very, very alone. [...]
July 21st, 2008 at 4:49 am
Now I’m really sad I wasn’t able to make it. Don’t tell me Kevin was leading that expedition (Sean, you want to tell that story or should I?)
July 21st, 2008 at 5:49 am
You can’t get good Tex-Mex food in Austin…period. Houston, San Antonio, El Paso, and any of the small border towns, great Tex-Mex abounds…anywhere else is just plain Mexican food…might as well be El Chicos…
July 21st, 2008 at 7:25 am
Okay…see…I was concerned because I went out twice for TexMex and found it pretty…standard. Perhaps, “meh” would be a better term. I mean, I liked it, don’t get me wrong, but fajitas and enchiladas are pretty much the same everywhere. I thought I was the one with the problem, or, rather, that I had inadvertently eaten at a lot of really good TexMex restaurants in the midwest, which seemed HIGHLY unlikely. We have pretty decent Mexican food because of the high concentration of illegal immigrants (see, there IS a plus to all this nonsense), but TexMex seems like a narrow genre.
Now the barbecue…that was pretty good and I’d never had beef brisket quite like that. I’m not hurting for good barbecue, though, either; Sweet Baby Rays has a great sauce, they just manage to put it on things that don’t necessarily scream BARBECUE, like meatballs.
July 21st, 2008 at 9:16 am
Haven’t been to Tejas in 20 years, but always wanted to go back. Never been lucky enough to catch a blues concert down in Austin. Too bad I can not catch the late great Stevie Ray Vaughan in concert down there.
[quote]4. Republicans can drink. A lot.[/quote]
(Hiccup!) Bahtender! Another Guinness, please! Thanks.
You just figured that out now?
July 21st, 2008 at 11:17 am
If the Mexican food was just “meh” then you didn’t go to the right place, and that’s unfortunate because there really is some good TexMex around here. Rudy’s was an excellent choice for BBQ. I’ve been eating at the one near the Renaissance Hotel for 15 years now, and it never disappoints. I wonder why you didn’t mention the sign that said “Sinks are for hand washing only, no -issing”
July 21st, 2008 at 11:19 am
I didn’t see it! Otherwise there would have been a picture.
July 21st, 2008 at 1:21 pm
Sorry I missed the party. It sounds like you had a lot fo fun. Me I have 3 weddings that I am attending this month. And I am in 2 of them.
But I am going to the GOP Convention. That should be fun also
July 21st, 2008 at 2:33 pm
Republicans drink, but we don’t pass out on your lap or throw up on your shoes.
We just laugh and call you adorable.
We drink to have a good time, not to forget our life.
Which is as God meant it to be.
“Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy”– Ben Franklin
July 22nd, 2008 at 4:08 am
A measure of uniformity
A long time ago, I came to the conclusion that when it comes to looking alike, conformists and non-conformists were pretty much even: Brooks Brothers and Beatniks are both brands, and rather stodgy ones at that. Think-tank researcher and fashionista…
July 22nd, 2008 at 11:53 am
It was great to meet you and confab at this thing.
Yes, the Tex-Mex in Austin is…meh. Get thee to San Antonio, where it is truly awesome.
Finally, on Day Two, I could have been mistaken as an interloper from the Kos Konvention…I was wearing blue jeans, blue Converse hi-tops, and a purple Hi-wyann shirt. It didn’t keep me from meeting Michelle and Michael Steele.
July 22nd, 2008 at 11:55 am
I saw him in 1989 in San Antonio just before he was killed. It was life-affirming. I’ll leave it at that.
July 23rd, 2008 at 4:34 am
wsj rocks ! again ! apropos of the prosperity conference !
look at the fotos on the first link !
the general theme is “where is the outrage” ?
and i must say the ignorance manifested in the lack of outrage frightens me very much …. we are being conquered, some may say without firing a shot, but i say its by implicit gunpoint, people should remember that hitler was voted in……
http://online.wsj.com/article/SB121677050160675397.html?mod=opinion_main_commentaries
http://online.wsj.com/article/SB121642367125066615.html
http://online.wsj.com/article/SB121659681885068955.html
and here is one from the ny post just for good measure
http://www.nypost.com/seven/07232008/postopinion/opedcolumnists/treasurys_thieves_121116.htm
the people that sell money were able to price money below its “real” price….and as a result, there
was a “run” on money just as if shoes were on sale……except that we are the ones paying for this largesse in inflation……
ayn rand notes that when moochers exceed producers, society implodes….
July 23rd, 2008 at 7:10 am
There’s plenty of good Tex-Mex in Austin. Most of it is nowhere near the Renaissance Hotel, though. Do you remember the names of the places you went?
July 23rd, 2008 at 6:01 pm
4. Republicans can drink. A lot.
A personal note: It takes at least 15 beers to come close to understanding the philosophy of the Left. Then you wake up!
September 14th, 2008 at 1:47 pm
[...] Think-tank researcher and fashionista (a combination well-nigh irresistible, dammit) E. M. Zanotti contributes a data point: Republicans get a lot of flack for the apparently mass-mailed dress code of Steve & Barry’s chinos and Ralph Lauren polos as well they should. It was all well and good when William F. Buckley was around and the Preppy Handbook was a best-seller, but yes, college Republican squares need to up the ante in the wardrobe department. Just switching to Burberry doesn’t do much for the image except reinforce it. But back to the dress code. Everyone at Daily Kos was surprisingly similar looking. All of them had that “so rebellious its conformist” thing going on … like they’d received a directive from their fearless leader requiring square eyeglasses, a slightly visible extra piercing and a one-size-too-small tee shirt emblazoned with a nonsensical yet hip-looking pattern. At least we vary the colors. I’ll be damned if there’s any earth-toned organic cotton yarn left in this world after this last weekend. Somewhere, in the third world, they’re having to use the discarded “recycled” polyester thread. [...]